May 9, 2008
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Why I don't own venomous snakes
So, I come from home from work at 11pm, kick off my shoes, and have a seat at my computer desk for some internet catch-up. A few minutes later, I shift in my chair and nudge something with my foot. Without looking, I assume it's one of Spencer's 354,646,456,597,887,736,449,111,996,022,520,412,066,305,620,178,550,687,542 toys. But a moment later, I again felt something on the same foot, and this time it was moving. I look down and see Filow (a smaller one of my four snow corn snakes*) making his way around my computer desk in search of some kind of shelter. I was instantly confused as I had not opened the tank since at least the previous day and I somehow doubted Alice had done so. I immediately examine the terrarium in the living room - the lid is secure, there are no cracks or holes in the glass, and both snakes are accounted for. I go back to the terrarium in the office - again, the lid is secure, no cracks or holes, but one snake is missing. How the...??? I look down to see a small pile of the green sand substrate on the carpet directly under the tank. I then notice a small opening in the floor of the tank and the light bulb came on. It's common for terrariums to have a hole cut in the floor in case the owner wants to use an electrical heating device, such as a rock, and needs a place to run the cord. When the hole is not in use, a plastic plug fills it. Filow was apparently burrowing, discovered the hole, and was able to dislodge the plug and slither through to "freedom" or as is more often the case - death. You see, the reptilian brain is very basic and entirely instinctive. They are programmed to avoid conflict by hiding from everyone and everything. Had I not found him, Filow would have been on the move until he reached the lowest, darkest, most isloated place he could find - in our house's case, the cellar. There would be no food there, and if I didn't discover him within a reasonable amount of time, he could die. He's very lucky, and I am very fortunate to have discovered him. What if he had turned to go into the other room? What if this occured while we were at the store? At work? On vacation? The plug has been sealed with adhesive. Crisis averted. Everyone's home and happy. Well, I'm happy - snakes can't experience emotion.
* Rather than having individual names, my four snakes are known collectively as Filow - kind of like Blue Man Group.
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